Procrastination

I’ll do it later.

Five more minutes.

Not right now.

I’ll put that off for a bit.

A simple, reasonable thought. Doesn’t seem drastic. Why not? Let me enjoy myself now. The seed takes root and poisons the heart.

Suddenly our limbs are like lead and our brains like cotton wool. We moan incomprehensibly as we try to sort ourselves out. We could just put it off like we did before. But now there is no time. Pressure breathes down our neck like a dragon and the hands of the clock are spinning like a fan. Gather your thoughts, gather your thoughts. Stay calm, take a breath. There you go. Focus. We’ve got to do this now. For goodness sake focus! Stay on task! Gather your thoughts, gather your thoughts!

But one thought does sit clearly in your mind. It repeats itself like a broken record in that nagging tone your mother always used to use.

Why didn’t I do this earlier?

The Train Journey

Temptation is like a train. It is heading for a final destination and as long as you stay on it, you are heading for it as well. No matter what you say for yourself, no matter how hard you convince yourself that you are in control. The train will continue on and on and soon you will find yourself in a place you never intended. My extended poem The Train Journey looks at the steps of deception that we go through when we are tempted.

See the complete poem on my website at The Train Journey. Here’s a taster below:

“Hello this is your captain speaking. Welcome aboard the 12 o’clock train to Dundeath.”

“I hope that all passengers are aware of the special deal we are currently running. It has been widely publicised across all streams of media after our large advertising campaign. If you somehow haven’t heard there will be no fare for all passengers who stay on until we terminate in Dundeath but fares will be charged if you stop at any of the intermediate stops. I would strongly advise all passengers to enjoy the journey and stay with us until our arrival in Dundeath.”

“Your ticket comes with free catering so please tuck in and enjoy the confectionaries and beverages on the house. An automated voice will instruct you on our progress. I wish you a pleasant trip to your destruction. Sorry I meant destination.”

 

Climb aboard at The Train Journey

 

Anchor Round My Neck

Anchor round my neck
Will you lighten a little?
Will you let me put you down?
The harder I struggle
The worse you seem to get
Can I get a few minutes to catch my breath?
My body creaks under your immense weight

Anchor around my neck
I don’t how long I have carried you
Every time I try to straighten up
Try to move forward
You pull me back over again
Bending me over double,
My face to the ground in shame
Am I cursed to be like this forever?
My life feels trapped in your hold

Anchor around my neck
You have told me only lies
You told me that I had to carry you
That I had to keep this to myself
You said people would laugh at me
If I told them I was struggling
You said this was God’s punishment on me
That this pain was what I deserved

Anchor round my neck
It is time to pass you to a new owner
My God will willingly carry you for me
It is not His wish to make me suffer
He suffered the ultimate punishment on the cross
Humanity’s sin hung round His neck
Including mine
So anchor it is time to say goodbye
You are no longer mine to bear

Matthew 11:30 – “For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Forget This Poem

These words on a page
Mean absolutely nothing
A collection of letters which bring a temporary emotion
Which you forget as you scroll down the page

But my God is so much more
He is captivating
His glory is breath-taking
An encounter with His grace is unforgettable
He sees your deepest shames
Yet loves you the same
He committed no sin
Yet took the punishment for all of humanity’s crimes
He welcomes all into His loving arms
He is worthy of all our focus and admiration

As you scroll down
Forget this poem
But don’t forget Him

Purifying Fire

Let the fire rage
Let it burn
Let it purge away any sin within me
Let it purify me before my Father

As its flames ignite within me
Blow any ash within me
Melt my earthly desires
Let Your new creation arise

Though there is pain in the burning
Hold my hand
And give me the strength to endure it
For I know joy is on the other side

When the fire’s work is complete
And the gold that you placed inside of me
Is shining for all to see
Use what is left of me
A sanctified saint, a purified son
For Your glory

Dark Tunnels

We all have gone astray
Ignored the warning sign on the entrance
We’ve entered into the dark tunnels
The whispers of treasure too much to ignore
We join the crowd, enticed by the rumours

The echoes of laughter ring off the walls
As we disperse into the underground maze
All together but our search is our own
We look for the thrills that we so desperately crave
We push on deeper and deeper and deeper

Suddenly you no longer hear the laughter
You’re alone but you have no idea when it happened
You can feel your cold breath
But you can no longer see it
It is time to leave

You try to shout for the others
But your weak voice barely travels
The clouds of dust cause you to choke and splutter
You are suffocating, you can feel it
You stumble to the floor

The hours pass by
You’ve given up on escape now
All of your efforts to leave this place
Have only taken you in deeper
You have no hope of being found
No one seems to be looking for you
Now you wait patiently for death
To come and swallow you whole

A bright light shines across your face
A much travelled rescuer has found you
He grabs you in His arms
Tears flowing from His eyes
I have found you at last

Self Pity

When we experience failure in our lives, there is a voice that comes to tell us that we’ve ruined God’s plan for our lives and that we are worthless. It lures us in, urging us to mourn ourselves.

But self-pity is like a fish hook that traps us in our past; draining our motivation and strangling our hope. As Christians our guilt has been taken away. We don’t have to wade the depths of despair. We can ignore that voice, repent and push into the future God has for us.


Throw off the cloth of self pity
Remove its coarse texture from your skin
It leaves you wallowing in the mud
When you should be climbing mountains
It makes you focus on the dark clouds
When you can soar above them
Its sorrowful cry is strangely pleasant
When you choose to mope in its arms
But its continuing screeching seems stupid
When you realise that Christ died to make you a victor
It comes as a friend on the path of your life, offering comfort
But it is a thief who will do anything to delay you
It will make you sit down on the side of the road while the race passes by
It will make you look inward when there is a dying world around you
Ignore its caring exterior and see its true treachery
Pick yourself up, dust yourself down
And wear the crown of victory Christ has given you

Overwhelming Love

You cut through my defences
Like a knife through butter
You disarmed me with Your loving voice
I was in a rage, in turmoil
Bitterness had darkened my vision
But Your love came like a soothing light
You stilled my beating heart with a gentle touch

That pain that had incarcerated my soul
You lifted from me
You banished my tempest of sorrows
Even though I offered nothing
You showed me a river of kindness
And bade me to come and swim

My heart aches for you
I have to know this God
Who has done so much for me
This God who shocked me with kindness
Who heard the silent cry of my heart
All that’s within me cries out for Your presence
Let us meet again
And let me tell You
How much what You did meant to me

Focus

Like a splinter in the flesh
Bad experiences have left their mark
Not dealt with; scars unhealed
Left to fester as time moved on
They are the weak points on which my enemy presses
They are the stumbling blocks which turn me back
Like barriers they stand

But how can I look at life with one eye closed?
How can I forget your faithfulness?
When you answered my cry for help
When you took impossible situations
And made them possible
I would not stand where I am today if not for you
So I will not focus on the hurts and pains
On the places where You are still healing me
I will focus on the great things You have already done
As I step out in faith again

Joy

Such joy bursting through me
My heart is a well of emotion
Overflowing as tears brim in my eyes
I haven’t felt like this in years

This is the feeling that comes
When years of deception are revealed
When you taste the sweet truth
That the pain you have carried for so long
You don’t have to carry any more

My wrists are no longer numb
No longer bound by old chains
That foggy morning has cleared away now
I can see the rainbow in the clouds

I am born all over again
There are no more hurts or pains
No more chains
I am reborn into new hope
My freedom has come from Him